Does anybody have them figured out? How do you know when it’s right? How do you know when to stay and fight or when to pack up and leave? It seems to me that all you can really do is go with your gut. God I hope my gut is smart.
It’s currently crunch time in the boytoy’s grad school world. Crunchtime = high stress time, which usually = some kind of fight. This semester was no different. If anybody were to ask me if I’d recommending starting a relationship with somebody in the midst of grad school and working full time, I’m not so sure I’d give it my seal of approval. It is tough shit. The elevated stress level alone is enough to get us both, and that’s just his! Add in my own stress with being unemployed for 6 months and applying for every job I find and still not having any luck, and well, I’d say it’s pretty much a recipe for disaster.
However, after a humdinger tonight, we are still fighting for our relationship. Still trying to work all this out and see if we can be happy together and have a good, lasting, relationship. There are issues, for sure. There is baggage, good lord is there baggage, but there is still some hope. Hope that once school is done once and for all (May 3rd can’t come fast enough), that we’ll have the time to talk and have fun and figure this shit out. We’ve invested a lot in each other and this relationship, I really hope that it isn’t the end for us.
